Running for the sake of completion

This fall, two relay teams of four Daily Arts staffers will train for and run the Probility Ann Arbor Marathon. But as writers, we can’t just run the race — we have to write about our past experiences with running, how we are preparing for the marathon, what we look forward to and what we are afraid of.

I’ve conditioned myself to believe that merely completing a task is not enough. They say “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” Why start a task at all if you’re not going to be giving your best effort? Why expect no more of yourself than just a “participation award?”

I used to play tennis competitively, but I wasn’t always willing to put in the effort that would make me a truly competitive player. At the same time, I didn’t think I could switch to playing tennis recreationally because it would make me feel like I failed in some way. So up until the day I quit, I put in close to minimal effort while still wanting to reach a lofty goal. 

The same mindset applies to the way that I approach studying. I’m a perfectionist, but I also procrastinate. This means that realistically, I’m not going to be able to give a near-perfect effort. So, assignment after assignment, I’m not satisfied with the results because I didn’t give myself enough time to put my best foot forward. Part of the reason that I won’t start earlier is because I’ve built up an expectation that the assignment must be perfect, thus feeling overwhelmed and doing nothing at all. 

Now that I’ve signed up for the marathon, in true fashion, I’ve built up the expectation that I’m going to run a 9-minute mile for the entire length of my leg. This is despite me not being able to maintain that pace for a single mile since my sophomore year of high school and having trained inconsistently over the past few weeks. But acknowledging that this goal is unrealistic and setting a new one is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign that I’m able to know my own limits, knowing that I don’t have a lot of time to prepare and that I’m not willing to prioritize running consistently over completing schoolwork. Doing something towards my new, unassuming goal of running one minute faster than last year — or even just one minute faster than my practice run the week before — is better than doing nothing at all because I feel overwhelmed. I will gladly accept my “participation award” of a medal at the finish line, knowing that I set a reasonable goal and did what was in my means to reach it. 

Daily Arts Writer Kristen Su can be reached at krsu@umich.edu. 

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