‘The Substance’ almost made me throw up in the theater.

When I was invited to watch “The Substance,” I was really looking forward to it. I knew nothing aside from the fact that my Letterboxd feed loved it. I don’t think I’ve ever been so disgusted and disappointed by a film in my life. In a world of film bros, I am but a mere Style beat writer, so maybe I missed something here; Maybe director Coralie Fargeat (“Revenge”) was trying to do more than objectify Sue (Margaret Qualley, “Kinds of Kindness”) when she created a lascivious routine to the song “Pump It Up” appealing exclusively to the male gaze. Maybe this film is supposed to be more than a scheme to singlehandedly make me hate Dennis Quaid (“The Hill”) despite my previous love for his “The Parent Trap” dad of the century. Maybe this movie isn’t the result of a horny 18-year-old high off shrooms and whippets discovering how to write a script in 12pt Courier New.

The sexualization of Sue was in poor taste. The zoom-ins of nothing but her ass shaking were heartbreaking. Elisabeth Sparkle (Demi Moore, “The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent”) creates Sue as a younger, hotter, version of herself: a perverted Jekyll-Hyde scenario. We see one middle-aged woman forced out of the industry begging for any path back to relevance and a disturbingly young-looking woman with infantilizing makeup. It was hard to watch, not because it’s difficult to see a woman use the inevitable objectification of her body for profit, but more so because the viewer knows that Sue and Elisabeth gain nothing other than a temporary quench for insatiable insecurity in both bodies. “The Substance” reverts to gratuitous debauchery to sexualize both versions of the character under the guise of liberation. 

As someone who has been objectified her entire life, I am the target audience, according to most. Instead, I just felt so sorry for both sides of the character because of their — or her — inability to see past the constant objectification. Finding self-worth in nothing more than her physical form ultimately led to her downfall. The aforementioned “Pump It Up” routine was supposedly catered to women, but the film only shows men enjoying it — to a terrifying degree. I especially love how whenever men are shown, they are not making eye contact with Sue but rather with her boobs. I think Fargeat is trying to objectify the characters so much that it becomes ironic, but in doing so she proves my point. Sue has little to no development as the film progresses. The character is extremely surface level in its progression revealing that their only function is solely physical. She remains consumed by her insecurity at both the beginning when she begins the experience and at the end when she stops the experience. Yeah, it really sounds like Fargeat is showing the patriarchy who’s boss!

Special shoutout to Brad Goreski (“The Fashion Police”) for curating a wardrobe that is quite literally the tackiest collection of outfits I’ve seen in years. Sue frequently wore nothing but a tiny top and cheeky underwear whenever she wasn’t in a shiny one-piece with the perfect cutouts to highlight her most important traits in the eyes of the writer — boobs and butt. The standout example of this is a blue mermaid dress with sparkles. As the final look from our protagonist, it should have been show-stopping. It was reminiscent of ’80s prom, and not at all in a good way.

Going into the film with absolutely no prior knowledge, I wasn’t prepared for the ill-advised body horror. I think the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen in cinema is watching Margaret Qualley pulling a turkey out of her belly button. It actually made me so nauseous I thought the row in front of me was going to see my Chipotle burrito from lunch right in front of their faces. I know that’s the whole point, but that doesn’t make it better. It’s not just the visuals; the way that sound furthers the plot and makes the gross scenes — which are most scenes — grosser is repulsive. Chewing, cutting of skin and even spatchcocking a turkey were all particularly difficult to watch because the sounds were accurate and very much in-your-face. 

There were a few things that did not redeem “The Substance” but rather acted as a small Band-Aid on a huge laceration. Stylistic choices like the older version of the protagonist, Elisabeth, almost always having pin-straight hair and the younger version, Sue, always having curly hair prove the director had some level of intention and calculation when choosing small details in the film.

The actresses that play the main character were both incredible picks. Margaret Qualley exudes childlike innocence and playfulness while also maintaining an air of selfishness. Demi Moore’s role changes throughout the film, going from a so-called washed-up TV star to nothing more than a face — and she does all of it with grace and the perfect amount of insanity.

I think I’ve pissed off every consistent Letterboxd user in this review. But hey, it’s about time I use my platform for good. Margaret Qualley, I beg you to remember that Lana Del Rey wrote a beautiful ballad about you. Please remember your worth. 

Daily Arts Writer Sarah Patterson can be reached at sarahpat@umich.edu.

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