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DEAR ABBY: I grew up poor. Because of that, I spoiled my daughter rotten. I gave her everything, but it has backfired. When she turned 16, my husband and I bought her a brand-new $70,000 BMW. I told him I didn’t want my daughter to be without anything like I was. She didn’t want the $70,000 BMW; she wanted the $100,000 one. My husband said it was beyond his budget.
When my daughter received her car, she wasn’t happy. She kicked the car and dented it because it wasn’t the one she wanted. My husband took it to a body shop and paid to have it fixed. She says that when it gets out of the body shop, she is going to kick it again and then it will be even worse.
I know what you think I should do. But if I take it away and disown her, she will drop out of college, and her life will be ruined. I know that I’m 100% in the wrong. I just need help, and hopefully, you will have an answer that is different than everyone else’s. Please help me with another suggestion. — AT MY WITS’ END
DEAR AT MY WITS’: Gladly! When your ungrateful daughter again damages the car you so generously gave her, DO NOT FIX IT. Instead, let her drive it “as is” and let her experience the consequences of what she has done. If you do, you will be giving her a gift far more valuable than the price of the vehicle. Better late than never.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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