The performative male. We all know who he is: feminist, loves matcha, thrifts his baggy jeans and listens to Clairo through his wired headphones. At the performative male contest held on campus on Sept. 27, all of these elements were present, but they were underscored by something much more substantial.
At Ingalls Mall, contestants lined up to “perform” for the crowd. Some held guitars, ukuleles or even a flute. Skateboards were propped up against the concrete ledges and poetry books were pulled from tote bag after tote bag. A matcha was spilled, and the crowd responded with over-the-top devastation. Many men threw tampons or pads into the audience, from which they received cheers and shouts of approval, with members of the gathering jumping into the air with their arms outstretched to catch them.
One contestant took to the stage and gave a passionate speech on why tampons should be free, starting a back-and-forth chant with the audience: “I say free, you say tampons!” The crowd responded with wild enthusiasm. Another held up a bright green “i’m so kamala” sign, and again, laughter and applause ensued. It’s all in good fun, right? But honestly, I did not have fun. I became more and more annoyed as the event went on, standing off to the side, taking notes and probably making a face that was all-too revealing of the disgust I felt.
There was authentic support for the social issues being brought up, not just for those including tampons and Kamala Harris, but also for matters concerning Queer rights, sustainability and feminism. Briefly, after the winner was pronounced and the crowd began to disperse, the organizers of the event encouraged everyone to be genuine, shouting it out as everyone left. But how can these issues be taken seriously when the people advocating for them are so unserious?
It’s somewhat ridiculous, standing outside in nearly 80-degree weather in sweater vests, flannels and thick baggy jeans waiting to go in front of a crowd and try your best to be as stereotypical as possible. It felt more like a secondhand-embarrassment contest than a performative male contest. I couldn’t figure out what was so funny about pulling a piece of feminist literature from a tote bag. By the 20th or so time it happened, the crowd still laughed like they’d never seen it before. But something else bothered me. The caricaturization of the performative male like this not only makes fun of the outfits, music preferences and disingenuous book-reading; it also makes a mockery of feminism and the other political ideas that have been associated with the aesthetic.
When a man stands in front of a crowd and makes a feminist statement, and the audience largely guffaws, it’s more than just a joke. It takes these serious issues and turns them into something meant to be laughed at. We support a man calling for women’s rights, but our laughter invites those who don’t support women’s rights to also laugh, point and say these people with their Labubus and over-the-top behavior aren’t to be respected. And why should they be? They don’t even respect themselves. How can you take someone seriously when they voluntarily play a Hello Kitty guitar for an audience that’s laughing in their face?
On top of that, labeling feminine behavior from men as performative and silly takes away men’s ability to be genuine in their femininity. Imagine someone who really does support sustainability, cares about reading works by female authors and enjoys wearing jewelry or nail polish that has been made to feel as though he can’t do those things for fear of being ridiculed. Those feelings of fear breed resentment and reinforce patriarchal societal roles, hurting both men and women by pushing us back into our gendered boxes with all of their associated stereotypes. I personally like my men a little girly, with rings, wired headphones and a nice little thrifted outfit. The kind of guy I’m describing has always been my type, long before it was a trend, but this archetype of guy has been stigmatized so harshly that I can’t express a liking for it without being judged by even my closest friends.
We cannot make fun of the behavior we want to encourage, even if it can be funny when a man is obviously trying to fulfill some kind of aesthetic. Is it really so terrible if he ends up actually reading some books by women, engaging in environmentalism and wearing, frankly, a really cute outfit? Why are we so inclined to laugh at that? Why is it so hard to believe that a man might truly support women that we refuse to take him seriously?
Don’t get me wrong — I understand that it’s harmful for men to act a certain way just to attract the attention of women, but going too far in the opposite direction is harmful too. There has to be a balance between calling out the posers and letting men genuinely engage with feminism. If that sometimes means stifling a laugh when you see some dude in a cafe with a matcha and a sketchbook, so be it. At some level, he must support the values the performative male aesthetic embodies. It can’t all be for show — otherwise, he wouldn’t engage with it. How could anyone listen to Laufey or read Joan Didion and not love it? Just the act of it means something to me. So I say let the thrifted clothing, tote bags and wire-rimmed glasses live on — they’re more genuine than they may seem.
Daily Arts Writer Audrey Hollenbaugh can be reached at aehollen@umich.edu.
