Heather McMahan has always been a huge cruise girl. Maritime vacations were a constant when she was growing up. “One of my parents’ favorite memories was that once on a Disney cruise they couldn’t find me, and I was in the hot tub with all my friends that I met at the kids club,” she says. “When my dad walked up, I turned to the waiter and said, ‘Garçon, virgin piña coladas for me and all my friends.’ He was like, oh, this girl’s going to be fine.”
So, it should come as no surprise that the comedian — known for her Absolutely Not podcast and standup specials on Netflix and Hulu — eventually decided to launch her very own weeklong comedy tour on the high seas. The Absolutely Knot borrowed from both her celebrity cruising predecessors (Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop, the Olsen Twins and everything in between) and her own specific brand of female-forward content. “I describe it as a sorority meets adult spring break,” McMahan told THR over Zoom from Miami. “Norwegian Cruise Lines said they’ve never seen anything like it. We ran out of white wine! At 8 p.m. on the last night, they were like, we have no white wine left on the ship.”
Here, the comedian reflects on her newest venture, how current politics are shifting her standup material and what we can expect from her on the silver screen.
Before we talk about your career, I did see on your Instagram that you recently hit Million Miler status on Delta…
Can you believe it? Obviously I’m a whore for Delta, so I do think they rolled out the red carpet for me on the announcement. So many people DM’ed me to be like, I’m a Million Miler and I barely got a bag tag. But I’m always bleeding out for Delta. It was so surreal, I got to the Sky Club in Phoenix to fly home for my show, and somebody brought over a spritz. That’s not unusual, for people to send spritzes, but then the manager came out with a gift bag. They wanted to take photos, but I was so hungover so I had to go to the bathroom first to put on makeup.
How did the idea to do your own cruise come about? As a millennial, do you remember when the Olsen Twins did something similar in the 90s?
I had no idea that happened. That’s amazing. Had I known, I would’ve been on that ship, so clearly my mom didn’t keep a good eye on that. But you know what? My mom and I were kind of like Mary-Kate and Ashley on this ship together. My agents actually brought the idea to me. People are always asking me if I’ll curate their trips, and I love to share so many lifestyle tips with my fans. I said yes immediately — I was like, we’re putting everybody on a ship and we’re going to force fun for four days.
Heather McMahan and her mother Robin onboard the Absolutely Knot cruise.
Did the attendees seem similar to the crowds that attend your shows stateside?
I’d say it was 80% women, 20% men. And then 10% of those men were gay and the other 10% were husbands. But also, a lot of women brought their single brothers, and those guys were cleaning up and having the time of their life. What was cool is that you don’t great cell service, so everyone was just down to clown. It was so cool to see women take time for themselves and create this sense of sisterhood. It was non-judgmental, unadulterated fun. There were a lot of solo travelers too, and a bunch called into the podcast this week to tell me they formed a group on Facebook for all of the solo travelers and now they have all new friends. A lot of women will come alone to my shows, too. This is the sisterhood of the traveling Spanx.
How did you go about programming the lineup?
Chelcie Lynn did something similar, and so my team and I went and scoped that out. It was a completely different audience than mine, but we could tell it was fun. We planned it for over a year. Tina Tompkins, who runs all my operations, spearheaded it and then we used Six Man, a large scale production company out of Atlanta. We first sat down and figured out what sort of vibe we wanted. It was theme parties, braid bars, DJs who pretty much only played music from 2005. I wanted the 50 Cent P.I.M.P. album on repeat.
And then I personally hand-picked all the other comics and talent that were coming aboard because I knew what my audience would want to see. The best part was there was no toxic masculinity on this ship. That was a huge takeaway — all of the talent were phenomenal people, and we were hanging out every night drinking after the shows, just having fun. And everyone that we asked to come on said yes right away, which I was really surprised by. I did have a girlfriend who is afraid of birds, so she declined my invitation. She was like, if I see a bird out in the wild and it lands on me, I’ll jump off the ship. That was Jackie Schimmel.
What felt most different about running your standup set on the cruise, as compared to either your tours or filming your specials?
On tour you can wind up performing for people who don’t necessarily know you. You hit more broad subjects. But on this boat, I was able to do inside jokes. I could literally roast people in the audience about seeing them at the buffet that morning.
Will you do it again, and would you do anything differently?
Absolutely, we’re going to do it in 2027. We need a year to recover. I’m sure in a month or so a lightbulb will go off about what I want to change, but right now it feels like it was a little utopia. I do need to learn how to pace myself and my vocal cords. I can’t be at karaoke singing “You Oughta Know” by Alanis Morissette and also perform for four days.
You’re on a new tour at the moment, right?
I am, it’s the Bamboozled Tour. I’m talking about some personal changes that I’ve made in my life. I’m talking about how women are too overstimulated and overworked. It’s a reflective hour. I’m also touching on political topics that I haven’t before. It’s a necessary evil. Basically, it’s about what’s important to me right now and also some reflection on the things I’ve fucked up.
Heather McMahan at her Bamboozled tour.
Did you make a conscious decision that now was the right time to incorporate political elements into your hour?
I don’t think anybody wakes up and says, man, today’s the day I want to make Trump jokes. It’s more talking about how we’ve been affected as women and also how we may have done some of this to ourselves. I’m looking at that nuance. I’m based in Atlanta, which is a great little melting pot of a city. So it feels wild that Marjorie Taylor Green is also a Georgia representative. That’s not my girl. If I ever run for something in the state of Georgia, I’m probably going to have to cage fight her UFC style and that gives me anxiety. But listen, I opened this tour in Huntsville and Birmingham, which I thought would be more conservative, and I was surprised to learn that so much of the audience feels the same way as me.
You’ve sold development deals for two TV pilots that so far haven’t gone into production; can you share any updates on where that side of your business is?
I just sold a show. I don’t think I can say where it went, but I want that to get picked up. Stand-up is my love, because nobody can tell me no, but I do want to act and do television and film. I want to play somebody else. It can be hard, sitting back and waiting for people you’ve never met to give you approval on a self-tape that you did in your mom’s basement. I always joke that when I have my funeral, they’re going to play a reel of every self-tape I’ve ever done. I do love auditioning, but I haven’t booked a gig in a second. Creating these shows — everything that I’ve sold involves me as the lead role — is another tool to try and just make what I want. I also would like to write a book, that’s on my vision board. I’m going to take some time off from touring this summer and will be tinkering away at that. Maybe I’ll fill it with a bunch of nude photos to make sure we end up on The New York Times bestseller list.
